my thoughts.14.2:

Last updated: 24 Dec 2011/10:30pm

(19 Dec 2011 - current)

*a place to say what's on my mind,

and in my heart...

19 Dec 2011/11:30p

good evening all.

I had a very busy, exciting and enjoyable day.

it started as usual with my morning responsibilities of pushing the wheel barrow around for about 15min.

after my chores, coffee, sportscenter, and small talk w/everyone; my daughter & I went to a couple different stores and 'loaded-up' on stocking gifts for everyone.

oh, and I have to say she had an absolutely wonderful idea:

use a seperate shoebox to keep everyone's stocking-stuffers separated and semi-organized until you put the gifts into their stockings. so with that being said; we had 12 empty shoe-boxes (my sneakers) in the backseat and gift tagged with each name attached on the lid.

very ingenious; my kid.

not quite sure whom she gets it from.

after filling every single box w/candy, presents, and such; we drove south and had lunch at spago,beverly hills.

I had absolutely no idea that reservations would have been necessary on a monday at exactly noon.

but we decided to wait the 45min anyway.

we saw a couple interesting people come thru the doors,

and some of the 'regular' people were just being plain assholes upon seeing a celebrity, no matter who it was.

and the fucking idiot paps were everywhere.

after we dined on fresh seafood and pasta, we made it back home before the 'early traffic' began.

and then I showered, and grandpa jack and I went to the staples center to watch the LA Lakers play the LA Clippers.

the place was packed.

and the lakers got stomped hard before trickling

back into the game.

I honestly have to admit, it is very cool to be in that arena when it's jammed pack and 'most' everyone is cheering on the same team you are cheering for.

I must have had 4 huge pretzels, at least... so, damn, good. after the game, we came straight home. (75min w/traffic) and now here I am;

having a scotch, watching sportscenter and thinking about sleeping in til 8a.

oh; what the fuck was up with the lights going out in candlestick park for monday night football?

yea niners, beat that steeler team!!!

alright, I'm going to fix another drink,

and then probably go lay down.

I'll talk to you guys in the morn.

I still have no idea what our agenda is for the remainder of the week, but did notice a couple 'extra' presents under the tree for 'yours truely'. oh yea baby!!!

ok, see you guys in about 8-9 hours. g'nite...

20 Dec 2011/6p

good afternoon.

got home a little while ago. we spent the late morning and mid afternoon at catalina island shopping/sightseeing and having lunch at 'the lobster trap'.

each of us having a california spiny lobster, veggie medley, baked potatos or rice pilaf. awesome place to dine.

if you ever get to catalina island,

you have got to try this place, it's worth the trip.

after lunch we boarded our two chartered helo's and took

a 1 1/2 hour tour of the island, and the cali coast from point magu to rancho palos verdes.

so beautiful today, mid 50's and clouds were just starting to accumulate when we landed back in the santa monica airport.

at the airport we seperated; the elders going to a movie,

Ash and her mom are now shopping,

and Jessica and I came back to the house to get some things done around here.

we just finished walking the dogs down the street and back, now trying to figure out what we want to do for dinner.

so much left-over from the party on saturday,

but not really in the mood for something heavy.

thinking about going and picking up some fresh 'salad stuff' along with about a dozen avacados.

in fact; the avacado part sounds good, especially with some salt and pepper. talk to ya later.

-continued/10p-

well now, I had a very nice semi-relaxing day.

I did indeed go shopping for 'salad stuff',

but even though I bought a bunch of fresh veggies

(ya, my garden isn't quite 'makin it')

and salad mixin's, I ended up eating 3 avacados, triscuits, cheeses, and a green pepper while I watched the UCLA Bruins destroy the UC Irvine Anteaters. *ok, let me tell you a little secret; these are the 2 teams who are main players in my screenplay... just sayin.

ok then; while I was feasting on my 'kinda-good-for-you dinner, Ash & her mom come home with a 2 bag of burgers and frosty's for everyone. outstanding sweetheart.

I didn't have a burger, but did eat 'half' of a frosty.

and then I was 'told' to go walk the dogs as the girls had some 'things' they had to take care of. so be it.

actually it is a beautiful nite for a walk, and I was eager to play with the kidz anyway...

so, here I am now just getting ready to crash as the

clock strikes 10p.

our plans for tomorrow; nothing.

but I'm thinking the girls; Ash, Ashley, Jessica

and grandma jo have some things planned for just them.

with the weather being forecasted to be in the mid 60's,

I may try to do the horse ridding thing bymyself, especially if no one is to be home to laugh at me when

I probably fall off again.

but I have to make sure that grandpa jack does not have a video recorder of any sort with him.

(he has my 'fall into the shit' on a memory card)

alright, I'm tired, I'll check-in tomorrow. good nite. 

20 Dec 2011/6p

good afternoon.

got home a little while ago. we spent the late morning and mid afternoon at catalina island shopping/sightseeing and having lunch at 'the lobster trap'.

each of us having a california spiny lobster, veggie medley, baked potatos or rice pilaf. awesome place to dine.

if you ever get to catalina island,

you have got to try this place, it's worth the trip.

after lunch we boarded our two chartered helo's and took

a 1 1/2 hour tour of the island, and the cali coast from point magu to rancho palos verdes.

so beautiful today, mid 50's and clouds were just starting to accumulate when we landed back in the santa monica airport.

at the airport we seperated; the elders going to a movie,

Ash and her mom are now shopping,

and Jessica and I came back to the house to get some things done around here.

we just finished walking the dogs down the street and back, now trying to figure out what we want to do for dinner.

so much left-over from the party on saturday,

but not really in the mood for something heavy.

thinking about going and picking up some fresh 'salad stuff' along with about a dozen avacados.

in fact; the avacado part sounds good, especially with some salt and pepper. talk to ya later.

-continued/10p-

well now, I had a very nice semi-relaxing day.

I did indeed go shopping for 'salad stuff',

but even though I bought a bunch of fresh veggies

(ya, my garden isn't quite 'makin it')

and salad mixin's, I ended up eating 3 avacados, triscuits, cheeses, and a green pepper while I watched the UCLA Bruins destroy the UC Irvine Anteaters. *ok, let me tell you a little secret; these are the 2 teams who are main players in my screenplay... just sayin.

ok then; while I was feasting on my 'kinda-good-for-you dinner, Ash & her mom come home with a 2 bag of burgers and frosty's for everyone. outstanding sweetheart.

I didn't have a burger, but did eat 'half' of a frosty.

and then I was 'told' to go walk the dogs as the girls had some 'things' they had to take care of. so be it.

actually it is a beautiful nite for a walk, and I was eager to play with the kidz anyway...

so, here I am now just getting ready to crash as the

clock strikes 10p.

our plans for tomorrow; nothing.

but I'm thinking the girls; Ash, Ashley, Jessica

and grandma jo have some things planned for just them.

with the weather being forecasted to be in the mid 60's,

I may try to do the horse ridding thing bymyself, especially if no one is to be home to laugh at me when

I probably fall off again.

but I have to make sure that grandpa jack does not have a video recorder of any sort with him.

(he has my 'fall into the shit' on a memory card)

alright, I'm tired, I'll check-in tomorrow. good nite. 

21 Dec 2011/12p

4 more shopping days til christmas.

(counting today of course)

so as I'm writing this,

I am truely the only one here at the house.

funny thing,

I used to love my private time when I was married.

but now I'm so used to having people around 'all the time',

I'm 'almost' a little lonely right now... ALMOST!!!

the grandparents left to san diego early this morning to meet with their realtor to look at a couple props she thinks they will be interested in.

Ash and her mom are out shopping... again.

and Jessica drove up to las vegas to have a pow-wow with her husband, and to check-up on our houses.

ok, I give up; with so many people living here and enjoying different shows, the dvr down in the family room

is always full of something.

I've tried watching glee, modern family & new girl (Ash),

csi, criminal minds & the mentalist (grandparents),

the x factor, southland (Ashley),

last man standing, 2 broke girls (Jessica)

and I just can't seem to get into 'most' of them.

it's rather interesting that 'last man standing' is the exact premise as 'tool time' with tim allen.

I've just recently started to enjoy 'homeland' on showtime, pretty interesting stuff.

so here I sit downstairs surrounded by all

these sleeping furballs,

watching 'leave it to beaver' dvd's and thinking about having some left over enchilada's and

black bean salad for lunch.

yep, I'm living the dream.

so, the question is; when will I wake up?

we're going to west covina tonite to the palacois christmas party, so maybe I should be enjoying this 'down time' a little bit more than I am.

ok, I'm hungry, so I'm going to ravage the fridge,

and then lunge the horses for a bit.

I'll check-in a little later.

-continued/2p-

not sure who gets the most exercise out of this horse lunge thing; for as sore as I am, I can't be doing it correctly. anyhow, just thought I'd do a 'quickie' before I get showered and cleaned up. Ash called a while ago and said they would be home around 4p.

and the three of us will be leaving to the mexi-godfathers house by 5p, just in time to hit traffic. that is one of the few drawbacks to living in LA, the congestion of vehicles between 4p-7p daily.

oh, here is a bit of knowledge for you guys;

exactly 'a year from today', the world will end or something along those lines.

so, how are you going to spend the last year of your life?

-continued/5:30p-

good evening guys.

ok; I have to say 'thank-you' for the christmas cards,

lots and lots of christmas cards. wow.

and yes, I did get some packages also.

please don't get your feelings hurt, but as I said last year,

I'm a little leary about eating homemade cookies, cakes and such from people I've never actually met.

but I do appreciate the thought.

and thank you to the 2 readers who sent the

collin street bakery fruitcakes.

(will open the cards on christmas eve)

ok then; so Ash and her mom got home just as I finished getting ready for tonite, and I caught them bringing in presents. too bad they were already wrapped.

so after they brought in the dozen or so presents,

and the mail/packages from my p.o.box in beverly hills,

we sat in the kitchen and discussed the plans for

tonite and the rest of the week:

tonite: the palacios christmas party

thursday/friday: disneyland

saturday: home for christmas eve

sunday: christmas

monday: nothing planned (so far)

tuesday: las vegas for new years celebration

now you guys have my agenda for the next 12 days.

I'm sure I'll have a story or two during this time frame.

ok, gotta take the kidz out for a walk before we depart to west covina, talk to you guys later...

-continued/11:30p-

I've discovered that by going to a party with two beautiful women as my escort makes me very popular.

had a very wonderful time tonite, and am actually getting home before midnite which is a huge plus.

we will be going to disneyland/california adventure the

next couple of days, staying down there

thursday and friday nights.

so this will be a shortened entry so that I can get at least 6hrs sleep before starting my day.

let me say, the hispanic culture knows how to

throw a party. be it a birthday, anniversary, baby-shower, christmas, etc; always so much great food and excellent drinks. (no alcohol for me, I'm driving)

one of the gifts I received tonite was a 8x10 framed photo of grandma palacios taking my cell phone away from me this last time it 'mistakenly' rang in church.

I get 'thrashed' for having my phone ring,

yet someone just happens to have their phone/camera ready for action?, sounds a little suspicious to me.

it is a good picture though, damn-it!

I also received a visibly worn bible with a beautiful inscription inside from the palacios family. very touching. hey, have any of you guys ever had 'rattlesnake stew'?

well, I can say I have now... taste like chicken, seriously. alright, it's nearly 11:30p, and I'm planning on being up

by 6a, so I need to crash.

will be taking my laptop w/me down south to anaheim,

so I'll update at least twice a day.

not sure where were going to stay just yet,

hopefully somewhere 'at' the park.

(watch everywhere be sold out, that would suck ass)

ok, good nite everyone. be safe.

22 Dec 2011/9am

good morning boys and girls.

just returned from the dog park, and took a shower.

now, as I wait for the girls to pack their gear,

I thought I'd do a quickie update.

while I was at the park, called the disneyland hotel's rez line, not a problem getting a couple rooms.

according to the agent I talked with this morning,

their availability is fairly wide open.

which is the exact opposite than what I was expecting.

getting adjoining rooms would be nice, but not a deal-kill. also, I had no idea that the parks have extended hours this week; disneyland 8a-12a, cali-adv; 10a-10p.

good times wait ahead.

grandpa palacios will be here sometime this morning to watch the house/pets until the elders return tomorrow

from san diego.

I have no idea what I would without the mexi-godfather,

he is such a life-saver.

he was pretty funny last night, doing karaoke on one of those home systems. he sang elvis presley's 'all shook up'.

ok, was just 'told' that we are 'almost' ready to roll.

will check-in with you guys later.

have a great thursday everyone. be safe.

-continued/11:45a-

hi guys. just testing out the wi-fi here in the hotel,

a little sluggish I have to say.

may just use my sprint modem instead.

(or I guess I could use this cord here by the desk... duh!!!)

so much interference though, no idea why.

didn't really eat much this morning and we all are pretty hungry, will be heading to the park momentarily.

catch you guys later, hope your having a fantastic day...

23 Dec 2011/1am

good morning/soon to be good night.

believe this; the santa ana's (wind) were blowing as hard today as a hooker with her last breath.

*sorry, I heard this earlier tonight while standing

in line for a ride... classic.

and yes; the winds were a blowing very strong today,

not causing any rides to stop functioning.

but the 'fireworks' and 'fantasmic' were both canceled.

we're hoping that these winds will at least deminish

abit by tomorrow, forecasted: 30-40mph.

we did have a fantastic time though, and the parks were

just as crowded as I had expected.

the wait times for some of the rides were over 90min,

thank goodness for 'fastpass'.

and we rode 'soaring over california' 4 times,

the girls totally loved it.

we decided to just bounce from park to park today, tomorrow we will hit 'downtown disney' gift shops hard.

but first we are going to eat at the ihop across the street from the parks entrance.

I have been going to this particular ihop for the

past 15 years during my disney adventures,

with breakfast being my meal of choice.

as I'm typing this up, I am watching the goings on of california adventure out the window. the park is of course closed, (it's nearing 1am) and all the ride lights are off,

but I can still see movement down there.

most likely cleaners and of course, security.

speaking of security, I saw a guard dog today walking

his/her post with a burley lady today.

they both looked tough as nails. just saying.

so, I guess I should try to get some sleep.

will be another 'fun-filled day' in the parks all*day*long.

oh, I have indeed decided to halt my publishing of my dailies after the holidays,

too many wierd things beginning to occur.

there is a way for me to still share these entries with those of you I entirely trust. I will be sending out instructions to you all next week when I'm back in vegas.

ok, I'm tired. we'll talk sometime tomorrow.

-contiued/7a-

good morning.

been up now for over an hour, drinking coffee

(excellent room service coffee folks here at mouse land)

and watching all the activity over at

the california adventure.

I have absolutely no idea why I am so interested in observing the workers simply doing their job, it's crazy. so we will be leaving to the ihop shortly to eat breakfast and then Ash and her mom are going to disneyland to ride a couple rides before the lines get crowded later today.

as for myself; I am going to come back to my room and wait for Jessica to arrive from vegas.

she left around 5a, so she should be here by 9-9:30a.

we have some business to discuss, and then will meet the girls across the street at california adventure.

ok, breakfast time, see ya in a few.

-continued/9a-

simply put: the worst breakfast experience 'ever'.

the ihop on harbor blvd directly across the street from the disneyland main entrance has gone down hill, dramatically. I should have known something was amiss when we walked in to the restaurant and this older gentleman was litterally shouting at the cashier for not willing to pay for scrambled eggs that look/tasted like baby food.

after we were seated, it took nearly 15min for a server to approach us, and almost 20min before we got our drinks. and when we were 'finally' served our breakfast;

the girls ordered eggs benedict and got scram-eggs with pancakes, and my chicken fried steak was cold, very cold.

at that point, it was decided by the three of us it

was time to leave. I asked for the check from our server who didn't speak english that well (from india) which never came. so after waiting 5min, we got up and proceeded to leave, the cashier was not going to accept my $10 for payment of our drinks, but wanted the entire 42.50 for the meal that was still sitting 'untouched' on our table. even threatening to call the police.

I replied; "call the cops, here's my card", and put the two $5 dollar bills on the counter, and left.

I did go back and take a picture with my phone of the meal uneaten as it sit on our table before I departed.

we then went to the denny's which was just up the block and after waiting 30min to be seated,

had wonderful service and excellent food.

what a HUGE disappointment at the ihop.

our server at denny's informed us that since the 'new owner' had bought the place a year or so ago,

everything has gone downhill. ya, no shit!!!

ok, Jessica just arrived, talk soon.

-continued/9:55am-

alrighty then.

Jess and I are getting ready to meet Ash and Ashley over at california adventure, going to get on

'soaring over california' to start the day.

I'm over the ihop fiasco,

but I plan on doing 'more' than just tweet about it. ok, so we are leaving, I will most likely come back to the hotel

and relax while the girls melt some plastic at

downtown disney later this afternoon.

see ya, happy friday everyone.

-continued/6:30p-

good evening my friends.

I decided to take a break from fantasy land and come back to the room while the girls do some credit-card damage in downtown disney.

besides, I was in the mood for some room service coffee.

I have no clue as to what brand this java is;

but damn-man, it's some good stuff.

going to meet the girls at 7p for dinner at the rain forest cafe in the downtown area.

and then, we hit the rides like crazy until midnight.

I'm thinking

(ya, don't laugh. I do think every one and while)

that because the winds are relatively light this afternoon, the fireworks may be back on the schedule of events.

I sure hope so.

we are staying here for one more night, and then leave midmorning back north to agoura hills. it's actually very cool that upon leaving here, I only have 'about' a 90min drive or so back to the house, traffic withstanding of course. living in vegas all these past years always meant at least

a 4-5hr drive back home on a sunday afternoon.

really tied-up an entire day. not including the drive down. ok, I see that I have a huge amount of emails 'received' in the last 8hrs, I'm guessing it's because of my entry on my intro-page. I'm so sorry that it has come to this, but feel it is necessary for me to take a break away from this type environment for a while.

depending on what transpires in the next 30-60 days;

I may be back to using this type of format to share

my journeys, or not. it all depends.

also, I am once again publishing 'a christmas eve poem' tonite after midnight. and will keep it posted until

new years eve day. please, give it a look-see.

whoa. drinking this entire carafe of coffee has given me the caffeine shakes, not to mention the 3 soda's and trunkful of garbage I've eaten today.

come to think of it, I am rather hungry, and I still need to shower before meeting up with my 'three' dates.

so I shall end this now,

and catch up with you guys later tonite.

Christmas Eve 2011/1a

good christmas eve morning my friends.

so here I sit alone in my room, only the light from my computer screen/keys are breaking the darkness.

I am once again mesmerized by the movements of the amusement park workers as they scurry around looking like they have a purpose. which they all do of course, but just watching them walk from place to place leads me to believe they are just going thru the motions.

I'm so looking forward to returning home tomorrow,

I miss my petz, even those damn horses.

I talked with the elders this afternoon; they made a bid on a property in the san diego area yesterday, but aren't sure if they will hear anything back before the end of the year.

I'm not exactly sure when they are planning on going back to australia, but I wouldn't mind if they hung around

just a little longer.

I guess the plans for tomorrow are fairly flexible, we do have reservations at an italian place for dinner.

the palacios clan left me a vm today asking if we

wanted to join them for christmas mass.

I haven't called them back... yet.

I'm not sure about this midnight association with them;

by the time the mass is over, we go back to their house for the 'after party' and drive back to the house,

it will be 3-4am.

I think I would like to be well rested to celebrate my

first christmas with my daughter.

I'm thinking the mexi-godfather will understand.

he and the mexi-godmother are planning on coming over monday evening and will be staying at the house until we return from vegas on the 3rd of jan.

what great people they are.

I've been looking at the weather for the las vegas area,

and it appears they are not expecting any of the snow storms that have hit the southwest so hard.

that would be the only drawback in being in nevada for

the new years celebration;

having the passes filled with snow delaying travel back

down here to southern cali.

Ash isn't due back in school til the 3rd anyway,

so she'll only miss one day.

the parks today were even more crowded than

they were yesterday. we used fastpass as often as we could to cut down on the standing in lines for the rides. but even then, it was sometimes a 20-30min wait.

we went to the rainforest cafe for dinner, and it was f-in' crazy, totally crazy with small kids. but the food and prompt service made up for it.

after dinner, we went to space mountain as it had been closed earlier for repairs, and then did the ride 'soarin' over california' in the california adventure park.

(that is my very favorite ride)

no fireworks again tonight because of the winds,

but all in all it was a fantastic time here shared with Ash, her mom, and then with Jessica arriving today.

we don't have adjoining rooms (they are 3 doors down) but both rooms have a spectacular view of the cali-adventure amusement park across the street.

my room is a jr. suite

(a king bed in the bedroom + a sitting room)

and the girls have a huge suite; w/2 bedrooms, kitchenette, bar area, 3 bathrooms, a jacuzzi tub, and a huge, huge sitting/den area. their room is almost the size of the house my ex and I had for our 1st house in vegas.

so anyway. sorry I'm doing the blah, blah thing again.

I'm going to go ahead and end this mess and get it publised as it's nearing 1am, and I need to get some sleep.

I added some additional information underneath the christmas poem to help explain it's origin.

good night/morning to you all.

-continued/10am-

oh my...

I can not believe I was able to sleep in until

almost 9a this morning.

and now I am enjoying my 'very own' carafe of

hot, beautiful, tasty coffee.

I asked the young man who delivered my room service this morn (coffee, croissants, jams, fruit plate) where they got their coffee from. and he told me that disney has their own brand and it's not for sale. hmmm.

not really sure I believe that statement, 'anything' disney can sell for a profit, they will.

I'll have to look into this at a later date.

so I talked with the mexi-godfather about this midnight mass going on this evening, and his exact reply;

"yes I know, mama read your web-thing this morning

and we all understand".

I tell ya what, the palacios family is a godsend,

and I have no idea what I would do without them in my life.

all because of ucla football tickets, incredible.

Ashley just called asking me when we have to check-out by;

I told her c/o was 11am,

but that I had already arranged for a late c/o of 1p-2p.

ha, all the girls are still sleeping.

I'm going to shower just as soon as I finish this update,

and am thinking of walking down to downtown disney to visit a giftshop or two. hey, I know how to melt plastic also.

by the way, I have started reading some of your emails from the past couple of days; and I had no idea that Jessica had changed my website feed on my gahollywoodkiss/twitter.

I changed it back this morning.

not really sure why she did that, I'll have to ask

her later today.

well, not much else to share with you right now my friends. it's going on 10am, so I'm going to get cleaned up,

and then take a walk. the weather looks beautiful outside.

I can see the trees swaying abit, but nothing as

it was thursday, wow!

ok, I'll touch base with you guys if I have time before we depart, or once we get back to agoura hills.

have a safe day everyone,

and PLEASE don't drink and drive...

-continued/1:30p-

I thought we would at least be 'on the way' home by now; stupid me for thinking that.

as I was just finishing up some christmas eve shopping,

Ash 'the sleepy-head' called me and said they all wanted

to go ride 'soarin over california' one more time

before we head back home.

so I literally had to jog over there in time to meet them;

I was at the fossil store buying some 'very cool' presents. (thank goodness, some people really are very hard to buy for) once we rode the ride, we went to the pacific wharf cafe

and bought some freshly made sourdough bread,

and some sweet rolls.

now we're back here at the hotel,

and I thought I'd touch base with you guys while I wait for the three women to finish packing so we can check-out.

the front desk just called me and asked if we wanted the rooms for tonite at a discounted price.

I guess they are not sold-out as I was told earlier today.

ok, Jessica just came in my room,

so I'm guessing we will finally be leaving shortly,

time to call the bell desk. talk soon.

-continued/10:30pm-

1 1/2 hours til christmas, I am so excited this year.

some of us have already received gifts from 'the fat-man',

not really sure if it was deserving, but so be it.

hey, let me ask you guys a question;

if you make dinner reservations 2 weeks in advance,

even giving a credit card to secure the rez,

wouldn't you think you would be 'tabled' appropriately within a decent time frame?

evidently, this 'host' was giving priority seating privileges to just anyone who came in and greased this ass-wad's palm with a 'jackson' or two. causing my party to wait almost 30min because of his greediness. needless to say,

when I found out

(from another waiting party), I was livid.

it was only after I actually witnessed his not-so-sly act,

I approached him and informed this 'mitch' (man bitch)

we need to be seated now, or I can tell the manager/owner what you are doing. after he tried to intimidate me with his sly banter, and host-attitude, we were seated almost immediately. ahead of the party who had just walked in and shoved some 'green' into his handshaked-palm.

after that little scenario,

the rest of our dining experience was perfect.

we all even managed to make it home just in time to watch the 1st showing of 'a christmas story' on tbs.

while we watched the movie, I broke out pictures of my holiday trip to florida last year at this time.

in fact, exactly a year ago tonight I was rv'd

in san antonio, tx. just me and my petz.

and I was actually so happy and content with where my life was at that time. jeesh. little did I know what was going to happen in the next 90 days.

as I sit hear typing this, I have tears coming down my face thinking of what this holiday really means to me.

I am hoping to share many, many more christmases with my daughter, but this one will always be 'our 1st'.

and having her mother, and grandparents here is making this moment even more special.

alright, I guess it's time to get to bed.

I'm sure everyone is going to be up early, how early I can't even begin to say.

I hope you all had a very safe christmas eve

thoughts pending...

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