my thoughts.2.2:

(13 Feb 2012 - 16 Feb 2012)

*a place to say what's on my mind,

and in my heart...

13 Feb 2012/7:30am

good 'moanday'.

(I'm borrowing this from someone, cute eh?)

so I left the hotel this morning at 4:50am;

and got back home at 5:45am,

just before traffic congestion officially began.

I took the scenic route;

north on pch and then turned onto malibu canyon road.

and even tho it was a little misty/foggy this morn,

it was still a beautiful drive.

upon walking in the front door,

I was greeted by barking/whining/dancing sibs,

and of course, a peeing beverly.

also the aroma of freshly brewed mud was enough to turn me on (non-sexually of course).

the grandparents were already up,

jack had done 'poop-patrol' for me and was watching sportscenter and reading the times.

*I like getting the LA times every morning.

I then checked on my kid, she was already in the shower, and 'requested' banana pancakes for breakfast.

so after I made the batter, I took my shower while grandma jo made the pancakes.

ok then folks, your basically all caught-up with my monday morning now,

and I have to dress for my appointment

w/school officials today. talk with you guys later.

-continued/10am-

I had to play the 'concerned father' today at Ash school, sometimes people are just bullies.

and her one teacher in particular... is.

so let me explain what happened on friday;

Ash was in her 3rd period class and had just started to take a test when a nearby girl whispered to her;

"can you believe this crusty-old-bitch is giving us

another test this week?"

both girls then laughed,

causing the 'crusty-old-bitch to flip out.

ms c.o.b. (great nik-name) walked over to Ash and her talkative neighbor, took their tests from them,

and proceeded to admonish them in front of all the other students sitting in the class.

and then she had the audacity to send both girls home. *something the teacher at first declined,

but every student who was questioned confirmed the

exact conversation.

note: she does NOT have the authority to send any student home. that duty assignment falls under the executive board members, ie; principal, vice-principal,

senior guidance counselor, etc.

so both girls did exactly what they were told,

each going home.

my daughter did call me and leave a vm that morning while I was in a meeting in portland, after which she called her grandfather 'while still on school grounds', and he told her to go ahead and come home.

he also told her "I'm sure your dad will handle this".

DAMN RIGHT I did!!!

getting to school this morning at 8:30am,

and after waiting ten additional minutes for

'old crusty' (priceless) to arrive,

we discussed everything as I have mentioned.

I think this old woman hates everybody.

so it was first suggested that both girls would have to stay after class today and tomorrow to make-up their missed tests. (the other girl has 3 she missed).

I didn't think that was 'appropriate' considering the fact both girls did nothing wrong to be in acceptance of such a punishment to be dealt. so after a little 'bickering' from 'crusty', both girls will be allowed to take the tests at home to be surpervised by their parents. I'm thinking... A+++

also, the guardians for the other girl, (a senior) was there.

I believe they were her grandparents, and they just stood-by and let me dictate/control the conversation.

they were nice older people, but just abit passive is all.

so listen, I'm not saying that I'm 'totally correct' here.

but I will go to bat and defend to the end of time 'anyone' in my 'inner-circle' if they need my assistance.

and my daughter has been nothing but totally truthful with me from the first day we've met. boom!!!

ok then, it's sprinkling outside, so I'm going to get going.

I'll chat-you-up again soon.

-continued/6pm-

hi.

just wanted to 'do ya' before I begin to fix dinner.

on the menu for tonight:

dinner salad w/tomato, cucumber, peppers w/italian dres.

beef stroganoff over egg noodles,

broccoli/cauliflower florets,

and wheatberry bread & butter

I love my home-made beef stroganoff,

and so does everyone else.

cooking with this group is normally done in shifts.

such as; while I'm having my 2nd 'happy hour' drink,

and typing this out,

Ashley and her mom are busy chopping the veggies for the salad and cutting the beef tenderloins into bite-size pieces. then I will make the salad, sauce the meat over the noodles (which have already been cooked)

all the while steaming the veggies.

meanwhile, Ash will set the table and fill

everyones water glass.

as far as 'clean-up' duties goes;

it's sporadic yet efficent... always.

ok. I'm going to finish up an email to a friend,

and then it'll be time for 'chef kiss' to rock & roll.

-continued/9:30pm-

good evening all.

well dinner was an 'absolute bust'.

just kidding.

the only thing 'busting', was everybody's waistline.

I love beef stroganoff.

after dinner & clean-up,

Ash and I took the dogz for a walk and proceeded to have a father/daughter talk, a real talk.

apparently my child is having a little bit of a problem with this valentines day thing of liking more than 1 boy,

and having all 3 like her back.

thinking maybe she wanted to 'go out' on a date tomorrow night instead of going to dinner with me,

I immediately told her she could go w/someone else,

but that wasn't it.

she wanted my advice on which guy she should give a gift to, and which other two she should give cards to.

oh my my. I was not prepaired for that.

and needless to say, I was speechless.

the first response that came to my mind was;

which boy does she like best. her reply was, "all the same". so we kept up the small talk, and I then suggested she get them 'all the same thing'. that way each of them would know they are all equally important to her.

now please you guys, don't persecute me.

as I have never in my life been asked such a

question for advice,

and especially from the only person in this universe that I would try to give the most excellent answer to.

she did indeed like my suggestion.

after our walk was complete, she went to the store and bought 3 of the same cards, and 3 exact gifts. that's my girl.

so it appears as if I still have a date for valentines day tomorrow night; my first since my divorce.

and with the most beautiful girl in the world.

what a lucky dad I am.

-continued/11pm-

alrighty, it's late so I'm just gonna try and make this

'night-cap' semi-short and sweet. hopefully.

I understand that I have been rather 'talkative' about my daughter these past months, sharing with you guys some of our convo's and experiences we've shared together.

and I do appreciate the 'suggestions' alot of you have given me concerning Ash this last year.

(two of you in particular)

and you guys have to realize she is my entire world right now, and even when/or if I do decide to start seeing anyone again, this little girl will always be number one in my life.

ok then. with that being said;

I now have anther story for you.

tonight when Ash returned from her valentines

shopping-spree for 'boys-3', we all went downstairs to the movie room and watched a dvd she had just purchased;

'win a date with tad hamilton' 2004

starring: kate bosworth, topher grace, josh duhamel.

with 'a story line' about a movie-star who's badboy reputation has made him unemployed in hollywood. (fantasy, I know) so the 'movie-star's manager' devises a plan to get his client working again; have a contest for a female fan to 'win a date' with the star.

now at the beginning of this 'very cute' movie there is a scene that has the movie-star eating dinner 'alone' in his mega-mansion eating food from a tupperware that one of his chefs had prepaired and labeled for him and sitting on a leather couch surrounded by plush interiors.

alone, visibly lonely and sad.

in the same scene is another guy;

'just a regular joe' having dinner in his little apartment eating a sandwich sitting on his well-worn couch, surrounded by his cluttered belongings, and being kissed constantly by his loving dog.

all the while this 'regular joe' is smiling, laughing

and enjoying the moment.

at this point in the movie,

my daughter turns to me and says;

"daddy, it really doesn't matter how famous and rich you are, if you don't have anyone to share your life with,

you'll always be sad and lonely."

at that moment she gave me a hug and kissed my cheek, telling me she loves me.

and then continued to watch the movie along

with everyone else.

a few minutes later I excused myself saying I had to go to the bathroom, and went upstairs to my bedroom and cried,

I cried so very hard,

and I don't really know why this feeling of

loneliness had started to overwhelm me,

and I almost immediately began to panic thinking everything I have experienced in my life during this past year would be nothing more than a dream that I would wake up from and not have my daughter,

her grandparents, the palacios fam and yes, Ashley too.

this may seem ridiculous to you guys,

but to me it was a horrible and lonely feeling.

I have never been so scared in all my life.

*jeesh. I just re-read this entry,

and maybe I'm becoming a fucking loon.

oh well... us loons are people too!!!

I'm done. good night everybody...

14 Feb 2012/8am

happy valentines day everyone.

wow. I just reviewed my above entry from 9hrs ago;

ok, ok, so I had a little bit of a moment... so be it.

I slept, my life is what it is. lets move on.

looking forward to my 'vd' dinner tonight, actually it's going to be a fairly 'early dinner' and then we're going to go see the new reese witherspoon movie;

'this means war', which doesn't officially hit theatres til friday. but the flick is being shown in most locations tonight for one showing only. excellent valentines night in-store for me;

my kid as my date and 'the reese' for my entertainment.

simply awesome baby. ok then.

I'm going to copy and republish some words I wrote from last years valetines day, as I still feel the same:

what is it about valentines day?;

it is the one day that two people are suppose to put all their vices behind them and 'play nice' for one day,

and spend an absorbant amount of money for cards,

stuffed animals, boxes of candy, and flowers that are going to

wilt and die within a week or so.

but let me just say this;

I think that v-day was actually created to give men

1 day out of 365

a chance to make amends for all the stupid stuff we do

'the rest of the year'.

why else would a 'real man' take the time to shop for a romantic card, buy a heart-shaped box of chocolates, purchase jewelry of some sort,

and spend way too much for a bunch of muti-colored thorn ridden sticks with leafy pedals attached?

unless he really, REALLY messed-up somehow

and he has to redeem himself,

or maybe the guy just wants to get laid; well and often!

and the ladies are always the winners,

unless they just don't like the guy, then they both lose.

I'm sure that Pope Gelasius had no idea back in 496AD that this day he had created in honor of the Christian Martyr; Saint Valentine, would be such a huge hit centuries later.

#justsayin'

-continued/4pm-

good afternoon.

well, I am just about ready to walk down the hall and

'pick-up my date' for the evening.

taking Ash out to dinner to a nice italian restaurante',

and afterwards going to go see the reese movie.

have had a fairly boring day,

I did receive quite abit of feedback about my

valentines day post above;

I wasn't being super-critical,

just simply expressing how I feel about this day.

why do we have to have a particular day to share our

true-feelings with the person we care about?,

you wanna know why? retail, that's why!

so we all can carelessly throw money into the frivolous economical system to keep certain business afloat.

just my opinion.

well shit. I just remembered I have forgotten to pick-up Ash' corsage, I've got to finish getting ready and get.

if your going out to dinner tonite, have fun.

if your staying home, be good!

-continued/11:15pm-

so here I sit on my patio underneath a partly cloudy sky;

and with all the outside lights turned-off,

I can see the brightly shimmering stars as they seek to display their beautiful exsistence for anyone willing to stare into the darkness above them.

when is the last time you ever just looked up and gazed with wonder and amusement into the incredible dark obscurity,

as I am at this very moment?

do you have time to stare into the night,

to possibly enjoy the serenity of it all?

I'm not talking to anyone of you in particular,

but I am speaking to 'everyone of you' at this time.

I know my usual 'm.o.' towards the end of the day is to simply bore you with my banter of what I had for dinner,

the activities and/or whereabouts of myself and my extended family. or to highlight the casual mis-steps of my sometimes inept abilities as a father/parent to my child.

but forgive me if I don't feel like rambling-on about an overpriced, under nourishing, well prepared fare that was served to me by another. or of the crowded movie theatre that was showing an above average 'picture' starring a woman who is currently on my 'exception-list.'

no, I'd rather just type whatever thoughts that come into play as I shiver here because of my lack of wearing appropriate clothing for being outside this time of the night.

so listen. I'd like to wish all of my female readers

(and some of you boys) a very, very happy valentines day.

I realize that v-day is basically kaput,

but would still like to mention some of you who have made an impact on my life this past year.

*I appologize in advance if you feel as if I've left you out.

emma s. doris s. sarah p. lisa d. karen g. cheryl w. baja.

adh. luna. may. stephanie. leeza. kelly. dl. teresa h.

michelle t. deb. monica r. betty l. mikki. racheal y. patty b. suzie. brandi. steph. charles. erik. dougie. ronda. patsy. miranda. thelma t. geri p. cristi l. wanda. mimi. tj.

melinda s. grandma jo. the mexi-godmother. lupe.

sue p. gloria. hepsi. crazy-eyes. punkin. precious.

ashley. jessica. and, ash.

again, my sincere appologies if I over-looked your kindness. life is a funny thing;

nearly two years ago I didn't even know who you were,

but now I couldn't imagine my life without you in it.

thank-you for all your kind words,

the notes of encouragement,

and the never ending stream of helpful anecdotes to assist me with my past/current tribulations that are now my life.

every single one of you matter to me,

and I appreciate you all.

it's really starting to cool-off out here now;

I'm thinking that boxers, and an xxxl polo wasn't such a good choice of apparel to come outside and do this.

my dogs don't seem to be affected by the coolness of the air though, damn furry beasts just laying around me here

all sound-a-sleep. and to think, in about 7hrs or so I'll be pushing around a bright yellow wheel-barrow picking up their shit. *along with those 'other four-legged creatures'.

eat. shit. fuck. three words to live by.

(well, I guess 2 outa 3 ain't bad).

I'm thinking about going inside and have a cup of some nightie-night tea and calling it a day-complete.

ok then. just came inside. my legs/feet are numb,

and I am looking for anything warm to cuddle up to.

need to get some hot water inside my body.

but I am rather hungry also;

probably too late for an omlette, but a turkey & swiss on wheatberry sounds pretty satisfying right about now.

of course, this piece of apple pie just sitting on the counter all alone looks like it is trying to say something to me;

"eat me, eat me now"!!!

hey, can't disappoint little ms apple pie.

first into the micro for about 30secs, and boom.

snack-tyme!!!

good night you guys. sweet dreams my ladies.  

15 Feb 2012/3pm

good afternoon.

just wanted to say 'hi' before we all head out to

the LA Sports Arena to watch the epitome of 'sad sack' basketball in the Pac 12.

ie: USC Tojans (6-20/1-12) -vs- UCLA Bruins (14-11/7-6)

I'm sure we will have 'another' sell-out crowd.

at least the surrounding company will be as always extremely entertaining.

by the way, I forgot to express my gratitude yesterday for the texts, and E-cards some of you sent me for

Valentines Day. thanks you guys.

I'll be back fairly early tonite, and will no doubt have a story or two concerning tonights 'grand event' and the assortment of 'wild & crazy' characters I will be keeping company with this evening.

ok then. the mexi-godfather says it's time to go, see ya.

-15/16 Feb 2012/midnite-

good evening.

this staying-up late is getting tiresome.

and I'm afraid I don't really have any funny stories or anything faintly amusing tonite.

but just in case any of you are wondering,

the ucla basketball team did not lose tonite against usc.

but they 'did' try.

once again the LA sports arena was barely at 40% occupancy, and the excitement level was null.

we had more entertainment in the parking-lot

before the game.

grandpa jack and I will be leaving tomorrow morning for the san diego area,

not 'exactly sure' where we are going.

I was told it is going to be a surprise, ok then.

we won't be joined by the 'girls' until friday afternoon,

after Ash gets out of school.

*jeesh; too fukin bad I didn't think about getting her

'no school' for that day, stupid me.

but, grandpa jack and I are discussing going to a marine corps boot camp graduation on friday morning.

I'll be calling mcrd san diego tomorrow to get the details,

it's been a while since I've been back there.

sorry guys, I'm more boring 'than usual' tonite.

g'nite, see ya tomorrow.

16 Feb 2012/8am

good morning everyone.

it's been a fairly beautiful morning outside since

I've been up at 5am.

looking forward to the drive to san diego here in about an hour; grandpa jack and I always have interesting conversations when we are alone for any amount of time.

still not 'exactly sure' where we are heading, but he appears to be very excited about this house they've purchased.

the weather for the next couple of days for the san diego area is high's of the mid 60's and low's of the mid 50's.

very pleasant to say the least.

I currently have some 'new issues' to deal with concerning my daughter, but don't feel it appropriate to share.

sometimes I seriously doubt my parent/father instincts and decision making capabilities. I was recently 'reminded' that she's the child, and I'm the 'adult'; ya... no kidding, but it still doesn't make the situation any easier to deal with.

well, I guess 'time will tell' how this works out.

contrary to popular belief, my life is not a fairytale and all warm and fuzzy 'most of the time'.

if I shared 'totally' with you guys I'm sure almost all of you would have a totally different opinion.

speaking of which; having trusted someone, and sharing with them certain aspects of my life has once again just fucking blown-up in my face.

sometimes I just hate people and their egotistical, self centered, and 'I am better than you' attitude'.

oh well, another lesson learned.

alrighty then. I'm going to wrap this up and go take my kidz for a walk before we get outa here in about an hour.

once again; the mexi-godfather will be staying here thru the weekend while were down south.

who knows what the prop will look like when we return. maybe a new room addition,

or something fixed and/or painted.

I wish the old man would just come over for a few days

and 'take it easy'.

but he never does...

-continued/3pm-

afternoon readers.

we made it down to san diego this afternoon in one piece,

the traffic w/ass-fuck drivers not withstanding.

also, here is a tidbit worth of knowledge for you guys.

for those of you living in a 'one signal town',

or even in a place not all that crowded with traffic

congestion 12-18hrs a day;

it is fastly becoming apparent to me that no matter when you plan on driving through the heart of the metro known as los angeles, you will 'always' encounter traffic congestion and asshole drivers no matter the route you take.

jeesh. even the the major driving routes with 10 lanes wide on both sides get jammed with vehicles ALL THE TIME.

fukin' los angeles traffic is shit.

why is it when you see movies about the LA area there is no traffic, it's never windy, all the women are beautiful and wanna 'bone ya', AND there is always, ALWAYS a goddamn parking spot available right next to the place you are going? fukin' fantasyland movies!!!

ok then, my car rant is now over.

we just made it up to our room a minute ago,

and I thought I would 'pound ya' before I take a nap.

only got like 4hrs sleep last night.

staying here next to the 'gas lamp district' again,

Ash loves going over there during the night, fun times.

jack is going to drive over to coronado island while I sleep and be back before 6pm.

I was telling him about this bbq joint, kansas city barbeque while we were driving down. so I'm guessing we will be heading over there for dinner tonite.

we actually had a fantastic italian lunch in escondido

(as recommended by a friend); the pizza was crazy good.

but no child for me, and no wife for jack;

means hard alcohol for myself,

and cigars & beer for the old man.

*not sure where he can 'safely' smoke tho without being tormented by some uptight squawk-box that has a

dildo up his/her ass! yes we all know the state of california is a 'no smoking' zone, so shut-the-fuck-up!

ok, I'm tired and I have to say a little ornery.

maybe I should call 800.555.babe to have some chick come over and use her hands on me. see ya.

-continued/5:30pm-

just woke-up from my afternoon slumber,

I was so damn tired.

I was planning on taking a shower and just relax until the

old man got back from his 'little adventure',

but then saw this little reminder on our check-in folio about the 'manager's cocktail reception' nightly

from 5:30pm - 7:30pm.

ya, I'm on it.

so, I guess I'll take a 'washcloth bath',

put my hair in a pony-tail, and spray a little fofo on my bod and get down there and see what the 'talent' looks like.

I'm feelin' a little naughty tonite...

(whatever that means.)

-continued/10pm-

hey ya. getting ready to call it a night.

the 'talent' down at cocktail hour was a little

disappointing to say the least.

not that I am considered 'the pick of the litter',

but the 3 rhino's, 2 water buffalo, 1 giraffe, and 6 hyena's were more in need of a zoo-keeper and not a suave debonair young man such as myself.

(ok, ok, so I'm 'not' that young)

after grandpa jack finally arrived and had a few drinkies,

we then made our way to the bbq joint;

great meal, and cool sudz.

tomorrow promises to be another excellent adventure.

so I'm going to call it a night, and crash.

to be continued on 'my thoughts.2.3':

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