LAST UPDATED: 14 Sept 2013/1am
I woke up fairly early this morning
w/a massive hangover headache.
after getting home from vegas yesterday mid-afternoon,
I found myself entirely alone (except for the animals).
so I decided to sit in the backyard
and have a 'few' scotches,
while enjoying this 'beautiful' socal weather.
and after talking w/a few friends on the phone,
and text-sparring w/another,
I 'apparently' fell asleep laying on a lounger.
only to be awakened by Ash & Elli just past midnight
after they both came in from their 'night of activities'.
and then I was wide awake til at least 2am.
(that was the last time I looked at the clock)
if I had been smart,
I would have taken a few tylenol pm's when I was
trying to get back to sleep.
*live and learn. always.
so anyway. that was my saturday night
'all alone' here at the house.
everybody else was somewhere else;
grandpa Jack is now in scottsdale,
l.g. is at her home w/her kids,
Jessica is visiting family in mission viejo,
and the girls had made plans to go to a friends house.
I guess I can't be trusted to 'do the right thing'
when I'm left unsupervised.
as far as today goes;
I've been nursing this 'pounding' fucking headache
drinking almost a gallon (or so it seems) of water,
eating a few pieces of toast,
and counting the minutes until I can take
another dose of excedrin.
(in about 20min)
*plus shuffling to the nearest restroom to relieve myself
of my excessive water intake.
and once again,
I've been left alone to 'fend for myself.
the girls are already up and gone,
(something about a party at a friends house)
grandma palacios is coming over
sometime today to bring some food,
and keep me company.
*I just love that woman.
as of this very moment 11:47am,
I am watching a plethora of sporting events on 4 tvs.
*switching channels on all 4 during commercials of course.
really looking forward to the sf49ers game
in about 90min.
I hope they destroy green bay,
and just plummet aaron rodgers with body-blows
all game long.
not that I dislike the guy or anything,
but 'he is' the packer's quarterback.
so I've decided to try and begin (once again) to 'seriously'
pen more of my ideas into my stories.
I've been working with the 'dragon' system to 'speak'
my words and have them recorded onto the computer,
but it's not exactly perfect.
and by the time I go back and proof read
and correct the errors,
I could have just saved time and hit the keys myself.
I'll tell ya, this 'falcons-saints' game is a good one,
ok. I'm going to post and get this site updated.
I may be back today,
and then again,
I may not...
11 Sept 2013/11:45pm
today is/was the 13th anniversary of 9/11.
and as in years past,
I was up at 5:15am to watch
the msnbc special '9/11 as it happened'.
*which basically rebroadcasts the actual 'live' reports the
morning of sept 11, 2001 'as it happened'.
hence, the name.
both girls were up by 6am,
and the three of us watched together.
even while they readied themselves for school,
and eventually left,
I was still transfixed to the television.
I'm not sure if my yearly ritual of watching
this particular show,
along with a few others today,
is morbid or my personal tribute to the lives that
were needlessly lost that day.
speaking of tributes;
I once again posted my 'remember 9/11' page as I
have the past two anniversaries.
I had planned on taking the kidz to the dog park today,
but being a 'bad dad' I didn't get to it.
it's a shame too,
it was beautiful for most of the day outside.
(there's always tomorrow though)
as far as the rest of my day goes;
as I was watching reruns of 9/11,
I finished my storyboard for the next 5-6 chapters
of my book.
now. if actually writing it was as easy as sketching
and sticking 'post-notes' on a bulletin board,
I'd have completed a dozen novels by now.
anyway. after the girls got home from school,
we took a trip to the grocery,
picked-up a few necessities and then stopped at petco
for a 'quickie-pet-food-run'.
*actually. I stayed in the car both times,
didn't feel hobbling around.
only 2 more weeks!!!
after we got back to the house,
the girls took the kidz for a walk,
and then we thought about what to do for dinner.
once we had stuffed ourselves full of shrimp
(it's still ALL you can eat, which by the way is a 'rip-off' when you have two 17yr old girls who get only
one plate of food... jeesh),
we went to a school function showing
of the documentary '9/11.2002'.
which was shown at a local theatre,
and had all donations going to the 9/11 memorial fund.
I own the dvd,
but watching it on the big screen,
hearing the speakers who had survived that day,
and of course supporting a 'great cause' was worth
every penny the girls and I donated.
and afterwards we went for ice cream.
always fun to have #DaddyDateNight
in the middle of the week.
so now here I sit,
drinking a sparkling grapefruit juice pondering
my thoughts of the day.
I also had a conversation with the same friend of my
past that I had mentioned a few entries ago.
we didn't 'talk' just text back and forth.
but... I did divulged some 'very private' information concerning my past that only a few others
have been privy to.
*sometimes it feels so good to just
'let go of your inhibitions'
and tell someone what troubles your soul.
also. this young lady (soon to be 50yrs old),
is besties w/the former wife of a family member of mine
that I haven't talked with in nearly 20yrs.
so I guess my 'hiding-out' from certain members of my family may be coming to an abrupt end.
but seriously. there are a few 'in my family tree' that I wouldn't mind having 'no contact' with.
sometimes people from your past just need to stay there,
in the past.
anyway. no worries.
I'm a expert of ignorance,
and for not looking backwards when the view
looking ahead is so much brighter.
if it was just me, I wouldn't mind putting-up with a few assholes here and there.
but since I now have Ash & Elli,
there is absolutely no reason to subject these
two wonderful young girls to the ugliness and bitter dispositions of a few relatives I had the displeasure
of growing-up with.
I'm not exactly saying my youth was troubling,
but it wasn't anything I want to expose my daughter(s) to. and before a few of you email me that
'time heals all wounds',
and/or 'forgiveness' is expected for all.
well. just don't waste your time.
I'm not trying to be an asshole,
I just don't have any room in my life for a
repeat performance of my 'childhood memories'.
ya. I guess you can say my past
(especially from the past 10yrs),
has made me hardened and less able to forgive for
prior actions, comments and behaviors.
but. there are a few people I wouldn't mind making
contact with again.
ok then. it's rapidly approaching the midnight hour,
and I am beyond tired.
so I will cease 'this worthless cause' of communication
for the night.
14 Sept 2013/1am
**I'm really fukin tired right now,
so I'll bore you tomorrow
(which is basically 'later today')
with some words of wisdom....
to be continued...